TORN APART with BOYD PHIRI
“BLESSED is the hand that giveth than the one that taketh.” These words sound lyrical, don’t they?
If you are a reggae fan, you would relate them to late South African musician Lucky Dube’s song titled “The Hand that Giveth”.
But to a pastor, the words mean more than just a song.
The expression has become part of messages of prosperity preached by most charismatic pastors nowadays.
You would hear a pastor saying to his congregation, “give and you shall be given in abundance.”
As you sit in church with the sobriety of a devoted worshiper, you would feel the urge to give to tap into the blessings as espoused by the pastor.
When time for offering comes, you walk in front and throw some money in a basket.
As you go back to your seat, you would see other church members queueing up to give their offering.
“Some of you have a lot of money in your pocket, but you would rather take out the smallest amount to give to the Lord,” the pastor would shout again urging people to give some more money.
But wait until the secretary announces the amount raised from everyone.
“Offering yathu yalelo ni K20,” the secretary would announce the amount raised out of 50 congregants.
From where the pastor is sitting you would see him fidgeting in his chair, apparently worried about the bills he has to pay.
When he looks at his day’s budget, he would find that the total offering for the day is too little to pay for his bills, let alone deliver the congregation itself from many spiritual and socio-economic challenges.
He has to pay for the drinks and mineral water the treasurer got for him on credit hoping to pay back from the offering.
He would need to pay rent for the classroom where they congregate as well.
It becomes worse when there is a guest speaker from another church. The host church would need money to give the visitor for transport back to his place – even a small token of appreciation.
These challenges would give the pastor another idea to preach on prosperity the next Sunday.
“Mulungu atiphunzisa ubwino wakupasa, koma imwe banthu simufuna kupasa,” the pastor would remind his congregation on the importance of giving.
“How can God bless you if you don’t want to give,” he would continue.
This would drive a pang of guilt in you, wishing you had millions of kwacha to donate to the church.
“Na offering ing’ono so, munga dalisike bwanji banthu ba Mulungu?” the pastor would wonder at the end of church service how his members could get blessings if their levels of giving to the Lord are very low.
This could be worse in low income townships. Most pastors have difficulties in enforcing the teaching about giving among their members.
They have to devise methods of drawing interest from a passive congregation.
“You could be here and you are saying pastor, bless me with a rich woman like Oprah Winfrey to marry – give and that woman shall be given unto you,” a pastor would say to his congregation.
Excited about the prospects of divine intervention to find a rich woman like Oprah Winfrey to marry, some men would humbly walk in front and throw some money in a basket.
Then the pastor would turn to young women, “If you desire to get married to a rich sportsman like Christiano Ronald or even Mario Balloteli – give to the Lord my sister and that man shall be given unto you – oh! Hallelujah.”
Similarly, the single women would humbly walk in front and throw some money in the basket.
But still, after counting the offering, it will come to a paltry K10.
“Nichifukwa chake simupeza vikwati muno mu church,” the pastor would remind his members that until they learn how to give, they would not find the type of marriages they want.
Perhaps this could be true of churches in poor communities. While those in affluent areas host weddings every weekend, in downtrodden areas they host funerals.
Everything comes with a price in some churches nowadays. If a brother needs prayers to find a sister to marry, his pastor would urge him to give to the Lord first.
“Give brother, give and God will find a perfect woman for you,” the pastor would say.
Even with the full knowledge that he has to make the first step towards finding a woman to marry, the brother would give to the pastor for divine intervention.
It is like a man who goes in the bush and starts puffing some smoke from a herb, while mentioning the name of a woman hoping she would catch the love fever.
I am sure you have heard something about this notoriety in many townships and villages.
But in some churches, you have to trust the knowledge of a pastor. So, this festive period you must give to the Lord so that in turn He can give you in abundance, as pastors say, “blessed is the hand that giveth than the one that taketh.”
bjboydphiri@yahoo.com
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